Walk through the Doorways of Doubt.
Don’t hesitate.
We shouldn’t doubt ourselves, but I’ll be the first to admit that at times I do.
It comes up when I am beginning something new or shows up right before I share something I’ve been working on.
It’s left me froze in my tracks, and has sent me scurrying back to a place of comfort and safety.
But today, I am friends with Doubt.
I remember when I was first planning to move to Seattle for college. At that time my family life in Salt Lake City was hectic to say the least.
My Grandma who helped raise me, passed the year previous and my Grandpa’s health was declining fast. My mom was battling her own demons and my father, whom I barely knew, was in Seattle.
My two little sisters and I sat amongst the swirling winds of life.
It was my cousin Erinn and his then wife Shanna, who helped me realize that I could actually go to college. I didn’t think about it much prior to then, especially since I didn’t care about school or my grades, all I wanted to do was graduate from high school.
Their ideas set into motion a series of events.
I graduated from high school and my goal was to leave for Seattle in late July.
But something felt wrong.
I knew that if I left for college, my sisters who were 15 and 12 at the time, would be left behind and forced to grow up very quick. Around this time my mother was entering into a rehabilitation center to help get her life back on track.
This is how it looked in my mind: “If I go to Seattle to begin college I’ll be staying with my father whom I’ve only met a few times, while my Grandpa who helped raise me continues aging in Utah. My mother just hit rock bottom and is seeking help, my little sisters don’t have stable living quarters, and my cousin and his wife are telling me to go to college, to get out of Salt Lake City and make something with my life.”
I doubted and I cried.
I felt like I was ditching the people I love.
I felt like I was putting my life above the lives of those who I value so deeply; doubt consumed my body.
The morning came when it was time to leave Salt Lake City and… I left.
I don’t know if you’ve ever done something like this, but it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. It was hard to leave the people I love, in hopes that by leaving, I’d be better prepared to empower them in the future.
Doubt has served as a vital piece that’s pushed me into new and higher levels of Life.
This story reaffirms the hidden blessings of doubt.
Now, I use doubt as the wind that powers my sails, taking me in the direction of my dreams.
Doubt serves as a flashlight that helps me explore the unknown, helping me to establish new truths of my own.
As I venture into this unknown, I grow.
Each time I’ve faced doubt head on it’s opened worlds of opportunities, bringing with it many insights.
Here are 3 Gifts that Doubt brings us when we are courageous enough to face it head on:
#1 – The Gift of Life – Doubt helps us realize that we’re alive. It reminds us that we can always grow in some area of life. Usually doubt appears where we need to grow most.
#2 – The Power of Choice – Doubt helps us understand that we have the ability to think thoughts and make choices. It is through these thoughts and choices that we direct our lives, attaining our best, and achieving our greatest desires. Doubt forces us to make different choices.
#3 – New Worlds Open – Whether you give into doubt or not, you make a choice. That choice opens new doors for your life. One choice leads to another, to another, and to another. Imagine all the doors that doubt holds open, patiently waiting for you to walk through them.
I share this with you because I want you to know that your doubt can be seen as a gift, as an opportunity, as something that helps you uncover your inner greatness.
How do you face doubt? Is it an opportunity, a curse, a sign, a blessing, a lesson?
Let us know, leave a comment below, you never know who you’ll help grow.
When in doubt, don’t. -Benjamin Franklin (Three Key Tweeter)
Peace
Happiness
Compassion
Respect
Three Key Life
I can relate to your story. I was 18 when I left my hometown to go to college. My mother, my sister, and I were being physically and verbally abused by my father. My other siblings had left home already. My sister, who is 1 year older than me, attended a local college in my hometown. I was offered a full scholarship at the same local college, but I declined. I kept thinking that I would still be living in hell if I stayed home. Deep down I knew there was something better than the situation that I was in, so I left. I felt like I abandoned my mom and sister, and I felt so guilty. I spent most of my first semester in college calling home daily, crying with them, and questioning if I should go back. But one day, I realized that I had the Power of Choice. I let go of the guilt, and began to expand my experience of the world. I agree that facing the doubt has led me to higher places, and I get to lovingly share this growth with my family as we all are evolving.
Hey Dana,
Thank you for sharing your story.
You are a strong woman and you make the world a better place.
Peace and Respect,
Jeffon